All adults in my family smoke…a few with medical conditions (like a quadruple bypass) that have made the doctors say "QUIT SMOKING." Most won’t even try to quit. Any suggestions other than guilt-trips and nagging?
How do I get family members to quit smoking?
Phew, just finished writing what you’re about to read. It was really hard for me but if it helps one person to stop smoking or to not start again (BEST OF LUCK NATIVE), then it will have been worth it….
My Dad is fighting a losing battle with lung cancer. It has not stopped him smoking but it sure stopped me… WHY? I’d tried to give up many, many times- stopping was never hard, the hard part was not starting again. I know how bad it is for you..blah, blah, blah… But when you’ve smoked for a long time, even if you can fight the cravings, it’s like you’ve lost a good friend. I think ony smokers and ex-smokers can understand what I’m saying. For me, it was: I’ve worked hard so I’ll have a break now and a smoke, or I’m stressed and I’ll have some quiet time and a smoke, or celebrate with friends and a smoke, or dinner with friends and a smoke. We know how stupid it is, but it becomes a real part of so much that you do. It didn’t matter how many times I heard about what it does to you…
What finally did it for me was what smoking related illness does to those around you. Watching my Mum try to cope and put on a brave face; seeing the pain it gives my brother to see Dad vulnerable and weak; how it’s affected me personally and the changes I’ve had to make to my life to help deal with illness on a day to day basis; looking at the grandkids and thinking that they’ll never remember when Dad was healthy- their lasting memory of him will be watching him waste away while all us grown ups try to make him comfortable.
Dad’s resigned himself to the fact that he never got around to giving up and so the smoking related illnesses he’s suffering are something that he’s brought upon himself. He told me a few months ago… in a voice barely audible, a few words at a time because he has hardly any breath… that he regrets what this is doing to all of us. It’s only been a couple of months that things have gotten so bad, we could all still be coping with this in 12 months or 24 months time. I don’t know if I hope we are or if I hope we aren’t- I know far more than I want to about chemo/ radiation /and my Dad’s bodily fluids.
If you smoke… chances are you won’t be lucky enough to have a stroke and die. Who’s going to look after you as you waste away? Do you really want to do that to the people that you love?
That’s why I gave up… but even I, still feel that I’ve lost a ‘friend’ – that ‘friend’ who is stealing my Dad away.
It probably won’t help, but tell them you love them, and tell them that is why you are asking them to stop smoking. And don’t stop telling them you love them!
All you can do unfortunately is learn from their mistakes,you really can’t make someone quit anything even though it’s for their health and you are worried sick,people don’t quit bad habits until their good and ready,and its not because they were nagged that will only make someone dive deeper into doing whatever it is they are doing that is harming them.It has to be their decision,when and if they decide to do it,the best thing that you can do is lead by example,a healthy lifestyle,and be there for them if they ever do need you,but do not nag….as hard as it is….o.k?
Contract lung cancer?
it is not up to you, they must want to quit. i am 40 and have smoked since i was 16, i quit 6 days ago because they started tasting bad. a lot of people tried to get me to quit, but i did not until i felt like it. guilt trips do not work and can make the other person mad.
Smoking is an addiction and there is no way you can get other people to quit if they won’t want to do so. It is something a smoker has to want to do. All you can do is to ask that they do not smoke around you.
you can’t make anyone quit. There is no ultimatum. It is something they have to do for themselves. And it is extremely difficult, although, there are all kinds of "aids" out there now, and some "programs", I believe are free.